The Danger of the Sexual Mystique

It is a very sad and very chronic happenstance. A child sees a gun. The child’s parent says only that it is dangerous and that it is never to be touched. The child, now aware of its non grata status, is intensely curious. The imagination runs wild with inquiry, and the parent refuses to indulge the child. The gun cannot even be seen, let alone handled.

One day the parent carelessly leaves the gun out for all to see — or allows the child to discover where it may be hidden. Into untrained hands falls a dangerous weapon, and into a naïve brain lodges a stray bullet.

Children who accidentally shoot themselves with their parent’s firearm fall victim to the gun’s mystique. It is a seductive idea — one that compels a person to lift away the cloak. Once exposing someone to a mysterious idea, the erstwhile secret-keeper has assumed duty of demystification. Either one can positively supplant another’s ignorance, or one can allow that ignorance to be replaced with whatever ideas may come forth.

It is most unfortunate that society’s discomfort with carnal knowledge prevents it from seeing the above as an analogy to sex. By dodging a thorough education about human sexuality, one makes an invitation for dire consequences. Planned Parenthood makes a case for the ill effects of abstinence-only education, which in my humble opinion is a stunningly puerile way to deal with sex. This bereft type of “education” is akin to tucking away the handgun. It contributes to the sexual mystique, and eventually leads to clumsy, uninformed explorations.

For the homosexual community, ignorance comes in two flavors: the usual imposition from social conservatives and that from all the homophobes of society. It is so sad that gay pornography has become an important source of learning for homosexuals. If I were in front of Mr. Lucas, I would ask whether he has shed any tears over the methods of learning that our culture has forced upon homosexuals.

I know in my heart that homosexual promiscuity is a stereotype. Yet out of all my gay friends and acquaintances, only one is a virgin. This must be a product of the gay culture. The silence that is imposed upon the community doubly hinders its ability to learn about sex. There is a want of direction, and children and teenagers are given the dubious freedom to discover sex entirely in their own way. Several of my gay friends have each told me stories of multiple rapes. A congressman would claim that this is evidence of the inherent evil of homosexuality. I would counter that it is the result of a dearth of positive sexual direction — and an overwhelming mystery that begs to be uncovered.

Silence is not always golden. We need to stop being cowards and start talking about sex in a meaningful way. No more dirty jokes and shallow discussions about techniques. It’s time to brandish scholarly texts such as Understanding Human Sexuality.